Almost 3 years!

I am looking forward to celebrating 3 years of marriage to my best friend. The Lord has been so gracious and faithful. I've learned so much about God's Character through our trials and I wouldn't have things any other way. I am in awe watching my husband go off to work daily and provide for our family. Seeing how God sustains him and gives him strength to head out daily and glorify him at work. Some of you may or may not know what the Lord saved my husband from but no one could have predicted his future. He wasn't suppose to be here, he should still be in a hospital somewhere drugged and away from society. But he is here! Redeemed and in his right mind! Leading our family, providing, praying for us and teaching us about this Great God that makes it possible for him to breathe daily. Glory to God!!! We have seen him at his lowest, body shutting down from a panic attack and yet reciting bible verses and worshiping God regardless. What a man! What a God! What an honor it has been to follow my husband as he depends on our Great God daily. I admire my husband so much. He has been such a gift to me. A real Christian man weak in nature but depending on a strong and mighty God for EVERYTHING and teaching his family to do the same. I pray the Lord blesses us with many children and the means to provide for them. I hope that the Lord enables us to teach our children about our Lord and how holy He is, how wretched we are and the mighty work that was done on the cross. We married young and barely had anything but the Lord has kept us and graciously showered us with His love, children and much more! We serve a mighty God. As we approach 3 years of marriage, I look forward to learning more about our Great God and of course being conformed into the image of Christ. May the Lord use our marriage to show the beautiful picture of Christ and the church. May He be Glorified!

Anger Anyone???

This weekend was very difficult for my husband and I. We had a huge argument. By God's grace my husband realized he was wrong and like the wonderful God-fearing man that he is, he came back to me and apologized. I listened to him but was too angry to be grateful. I lost my temper during the argument, bruised my right hand and raised my voice. I was angry because I lost control and I was also angry because I felt like I was a horrible witness for the Lord in the apartment complex that we live in. This was Friday night. Saturday night, my husband opened his precious heart to me and told me something I didn't like and I was so upset that I went downstairs to our living room and pretty much cried, prayed and listened to sermons on God's Character until I was calm. It was an extremely humbling weekend and my eyes still burn from all the tears. This is horrible please pray that the Lord would help you not to do what I did Friday and Saturday. Continuing in such a pattern would only create a hostile environment in your marriage and cause your spouse not to open up. My husband can be very gracious and he knew about my anger issues before marrying me and so he tries to long-suffering and help me find better ways to express myself. I'm so thankful for how patient he is. I've never had someone slow me down and help me evaluate why I'm getting angry and what I want to articulate. I know this probably sounds silly but this is one of the many ways the Lord is using my marriage to sanctify me and help me.

A little Background
Growing up, I've always had an anger problem. In my teenage years, I struggled with depression, suicidal thoughts and occasionally hurt myself physically when I was upset. My parents had an extremely hard time having children so when the Lord opened my mother's womb everyone was happy. When she gave birth to me though painful she was overjoyed. My brother who is 5 years older than me loved his little sister and was always very protective. My dad along with my mother covered me attention and affection. I rarely didn't get what I wanted. I was and still am a horrible sinner. I cried all the time (so much so that they would tease me and call me a cry baby), I demanded my way and when I didn't get it, I screamed until I did. All my issues as a teenager came from the fact that I was a murderer at heart, who wants to rule and control everyone. I yearned for constant affirmation, affection and service. Without those things I felt unloved and wanted to destroy everyone including myself. I didn't know or understand how to live without these things. After becoming a believer at 18, I still struggled horribly. I was no longer screaming until I got what I wanted but would lose my temper, yell and say things that would scar others. Salvation made the war in my members more real. I realized that I was not in control and that I desperately needed the Lord to rescue me. It is only through surrender to Jesus as LORD that I am set free. This is still very hard today but I definitely see God's hand and I'm humbled and brought back to reality when I fail. Whatever good I am able to do as a Christian it is only by His grace. I know how depraved I am and I war in my members daily. Today I just want to praise God for dying on the cross and making salvation available to those who would believe and call upon His name. I think Him for drawing me to Himself and suffering long with me and working in me. I clearly deserve nothing but His wrath and yet he gives me life time and time again. What a Savior! What a God! Who can love like that?


Praise be to God my husband and I are fine now. I'm so thankful that the Lord broke my heart, humbled me and helped me to forgive my husband and not be bitter. Glory to God!

Psalm 130: 3-8

If you, O Lord, should mark iniquities,
    O Lord, who could stand?

But with you there is forgiveness,
    that you may be feared.

 
I wait for the Lord, my soul waits,
    and in his word I hope;

my soul waits for the Lord
    more than watchmen for the morning,
    more than watchmen for the morning.
 
O Israel, hope in the Lord!
    For with the Lord there is steadfast love,
    and with him is plentiful redemption.

And he will redeem Israel
    from all his iniquities.

Bible Study Tools

"Have nothing to do with irreverent, silly myths. Rather train yourself for godliness;" 1 Timothy 4:7

Do you have questions about marriage?

Do you want to understand what the gospel is?

Do you have questions about God's Character?

DesiringGod.org is a wonderful website that can help you understand the bible better

Here's a little video for some more information on what you will find on the site

How Past Sexual Abuse Has Affected Intimacy In My Marriage

I just read an article titled "How Past Sexual Abuse Has Affected Intimacy In My Marriage" and it was so helpful. As some of you may know, my past before marriage was filled with different types of sexual assaults from rape to unwanted touching. My first assault was done when I was only 3 or 4 and the last was only 2 years before meeting my now wonderful husband and that one was the worse one ever and I have yet to heal fully from what happened. Yes, both my past and my husband's past has greatly affected our marriage but our Lord is great and continuing the work he began in us both. The Elders at our church are aware of our struggles and pray for us, we also pray for and with each other.  This little paragraph pretty much sums up my biggest struggle She says: "I still struggle with fear of failure, of expectation. In my own mind, if I feel that I am supposed to deliver on demand or that a romantic dinner is going to automatically lead to an exciting night of intimacy, I psych myself out. Instantly I am not the one in control and my fears are triggered again. There is a lack of trust within me that affects not only my intimate relationship with my husband, but also with God." But I am encouraged for I know that the other statement she made in this article is true and that is that "God wants us to be free. Free to experience intimacy in our relationship with our husbands, and that our enemy desperately wants to prevent this from happening."

Be of Good Courage and do not lose hope if you are in a similar circumstance. We are still wrestling with a few things but we definitely see God's hand working and healing.

To Read the Actual article CLICK HERE

Jill Duggar is Engaged to Derick Dillard!!!!

PRAISE GOD! THIS IS EXCITING NEWS! GOD BLESS THOSE TWO!

New Apartment =)

Hello Friends,

As you all know, March 1st was supposed to be our last day in the condo and on February 28th we got a phone call from a complex we were praying about that we were approved for a 2 bedroom duplex in a much better neighborhood. March 1st we spent the day moving out.

By the Grace of God, we were able to schedule a moving company and we are now living in our marvelous 2 bedroom duplex apartment. Thank you all for praying for us and encouraging us.

Our little boy loves his bedroom and sleeps through the night. I (Marie) am 18 weeks pregnant now and we find out baby#2's gender April 3rd! We're extremely excited and so is Aidenn. He is going to be a big brother. Praise God!

I hope you all have a marvelous weekend.

God bless!

Modest Wedding Dresses!

 It's Wedding Season! ^_^

Wanted to share a few websites with super cute and modest wedding dresses. Enjoy!

http://www.altamodabridal.com/modest-wedding-dresses/

http://www.beautifullymodest.com/

http://www.adressyoccasion.com/Bridal

Q&A- Courtship Guidance

by Carolyn Mahaney 

She is the wife of Pastor CJ Mahaney and this is how they guided their daughters when it came to choosing a mate. It has been extremely helpful for me and so I wanted to share it with you guys =)

A“list” from Scripture of essential qualities that should characterize any man desirous of pursuing them. These qualities included:

“1. Genuine passion for God. The greatest commandment is to ‘love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind’ (Matt. 22:37). A mere profession of faith is insufficient. A godly man will consistently display love, obedience, and increasing passion for the Savior.

2. Authentic humility. ‘This is the one to whom I will look,’ says the Lord, ‘he who is humble and contrite in spirit and trembles at my word’ (Isa. 66:2). Your daughter will marry a sinner—that is certain. But if he is a humble and teachable sinner who is quick to repent, then he will be sure to grow in godliness. This humility will also be evident in his love for and submission to God’s Word.

3. Love for the local church. At the center of God’s plan on earth is His church. A young man must be pursuing fellowship and serving faithfully in a local church if he is to make a good candidate for a husband.

4. Biblical convictions about manhood and womanhood. A successful marriage is due in large part to a couple’s grasp of their respective roles and responsibilities. A potential husband must be committed to complementary roles found in Scripture. He must be ready to embrace his responsibility to love and lead his wife. (Eph. 5:22-25).

In addition to comparing the young man to this list of essentials, we also helped our daughters evaluate God’s commands to wives. From Scripture we asked our daughters the following questions regarding the young man each was considering:

            -Do you fully respect this man the way a wife is called to respect her husband?
            -Can you eagerly submit to him as the church submits to Christ?
            -Do you have faith to follow this man no matter where he may lead?
            -Can you love this man with a tender, affectionate love?
            (1 Cor. 11:3; Eph. 5:22, 33; Col. 3:8; Titus 2:4-5)

Again, this list of qualities and questions is not exhaustive. However, it provided clear, objective, and biblical criteria to assist our daughters in determining God’s will—whether or not they were meant to join their lives with a certain young man.

For the entire post go to http://www.girltalkhome.com/blog/Q_A12

Birth Control

Coming from a Roman Catholic background, I tend to look at my sisters' lives see them doing something good like having a natural birth and making it a law that I must follow in order to glorify and honor the Lord. I find myself constantly in chains, entangled in laws I've placed on myself. Our Lord, so faithful and merciful continually points this out to me and shows me the idolatry in my heart. As you all know my husband and I have been convicted about birth control since before we were married, by the grace of God we were with child soon after we married. The Lord in His wisdom saw it fit to allow us to have a C-section and as a result we were told not to have children for at least 18 months. We now use a method of birth control and it hasn't been easy. The enemy never ceases to labor and my husband and I have to constantly wrestle against condemnation and much more. Not sure what the Lord is doing but looking forward to learning more about the will of God concerning our family size. We don't know whether it is something we ought to surrender to Him or our responsibility to plan as a couple. It's all so confusing. We're still reading the word and praying. Lord willing He will answer our cry soon.

Tears Of Joy!

As you all know, my past sin of fornication tore my husband's heart apart when we were courting. He felt defraud and helpless. The Lord had to strengthen him and help him love me in spite of it all. The gospel was his help, remembering what Christ had done for him along with confessing to the Lord his bitterness and how though he knew the Gospel, he still found it hard to love me.

On my wedding day, I walked down the isle in faith, hoping in the Lord to fully restore Tyrell so that he may love me as God loves the Church. Trusting in the faithfulness of the Lord, I said I do making a commitment to love him until death no matter what.

 I walked down the isle smiling yet filled with questions. Tyrell was smiling, I didn't understand why. I didn't feel beautiful, I didn't feel worthy but I knew that what I was getting ready to do was what I felt God desired of me. I hoped that Ty would heal and love me and my hope was my comfort. I was to shy to look at him and terrified to embrace him for the first time.

We married in obedience to the Lord, knowing that the road would be hard but trusting Him nevertheless. Saturday, June 9th 2012, months after our marriage, we somehow ended up talking about how he views me. His struggle in our courtship was elevating my sin above my redemption and having a hard time seeing me as something to be prized. I thought he still struggled with that. While talking, tears ran down my face and my heart was exposed and he saw the hurt and broken due to what I believed. He gently got up grabbed his journal and began to read to me. It was titled:

"October 29th 2011-The day my life changes forever-marriage"

 It was 1:49am when he wrote it. He wrote about how thankful he was to have me as a wife, he wrote about how much he treasured me and wanted no other. The entry is filled with praises to the Lord for all he had done. Most importantly MY HUSBAND WAS GLORYING IN THE CROSS!!!!!!! HE SAW ME AS A NEW CREATURE! I WAS PRIZED IN HIS SIGHT BECAUSE OF WHAT JESUS CHRIST HAD DONE! It answered my questions and showed me that the smile he had on his face was genuine, my prayer and hope had already been answered. My groom delighted in me and couldn't wait to love me with his life. I was in tears! God answered my prayer months ago and I had no idea! Praise the Lord for His faithfulness in redeeming. I cannot thank God enough. My husband's heart races at the thought of me, he delights in me! Praise God!

Single Men - Biblical Conduct Towards Women

Conformity to Christ

This sermon is really good and sheds a much needed light on what a biblical marriage is. This is the call of marriage and God's purpose in it. Glory to God. Hope it blesses you all!

Some Outstanding Godly Counsel

As you guys know, I was not a virgin when I married my now husband Tyrell Samuels and that broke his heart. By the grace of God, the Lord led me throughout our friendship and I was able to tell him about my shameful past before we entered matrimony. Now that I look back, I wish that would have been the first thing I mentioned to him when we met but the church where I fellowshipped at the time told me that it was wrong and indiscreet to tell people about my past and dealt with me very harshly for doing so in the past.

we grew closer as the Lord was bringing us together and praise the Lord I got to share with him my terrible past but sadly this was after he had disclose his intentions towards me. It shattered him but the Lord held him and with the conviction he had to marry me though still wounded went ahead in faith trusting that the Lord would heal him and help him.

I share all of this to say that I STRONGLY encourage you to be transparent from the beginning. Do not hide past sins whatever it may be and allow people to glory in the cross and see God's redemptive work rather than giving them the opportunity to create something in their minds that is far from the truth. Let's not be deceptive but transparent and may God be glorified for His amazing work!

Let us decrease while He increases pointing to our maker who has reached down and saved us from our shameful ways and made us new creatures in Him. To Him be all the glory and praise forever. AMEN!

Surprise Baby Shower!

I am beyond thankful! The idea of having a baby shower when Ty and I live in a small little room in a basement that can't even hold all our things was an impossibility. I threw that idea out the window and just continued to pray that the Lord would bless us with the things we need for baby's arrival. Without a shower, the Lord had already provided bags of clothes for baby's first year, along with a brand new crib, walker and other important items. 

God not only answered my prayers but made the impossible possible. I had a baby shower!!! There was so much food and the decorations were beautiful! Not to mention people I've been wanting to see for months! What a mighty God we serve! We were also showered with love and more gifts for baby and we are eagerly waiting his arrival. We are so thankful for our brothers and sisters who labored. 

In my husband's Words:

"I'm so thankful to the Lord that I can experience church, and even watch God take care of His children through the church. Where my wife and I have lost a mother we have gained mothers in the church, where my wife and I have lost brothers, we have gained brothers in the church, where we have lost fathers, we have gained fathers in the church, uncles, aunts, sisters. What we have lost in pursuing Christ with total abandon we have gained 10fold. Our Heavenly Father has provided for His children, and He continues to provide. And still, never have I seen the righteous forsaken...or his children begging for bread. May the Lord use us in the same way for others."

Where Are The Boundaries?

We are Closed gardens who belong to the Lord. No one should be allowed to smell the flowers nor see what types of flowers are beyond the gates unless our Lord gives them the key. 

It's so sad, we've gotten to a place where we place limitations on those who should be intimate and yet allow those who are not pursuing intimacy to cross every line. I see so many books on dating and boundaries and have yet to come across one on singleness and using discretion/having boundaries. We encourage our singles to create intimacy with one another, enjoy the emotional blessings of marriage and yet expect a smooth transition when they are being called to marriage.

Here's how this reality has wrecked havoc in Ty and I's marriage.

I had to endure and still endure sisters flirting with my husband in my presence, grab and force themselves on him to hug him as we enter a place and neglecting to say anything to me, treat me very harshly because they felt like they lost something that was rightfully theirs.

This is such a serious topic that is being ignored in the church. 
Singles not knowing that they ought to have discretion, crossing each others boundaries, creating emotional intimacy with other singles of the opposite sex, revealing things that only their husbands should know along with depending on them when feeling sad, angry etc... 

It's not OK to enjoy the blessings of marriage in our singleness with a man who is not our husbands. I didn't understand this truth and partook in it until the Lord called me to marry my husband.

We have been so preoccupied by the "Don't have sex" movement that we have neglected to teach many other boundaries that are just as important. We ought not to cross any lines, we ought not to create attachments that will later have to be destroyed for the glory of God. Let us all fervently seek the Lord about this for this is not about keeping some law of discretion, modesty, purity etc... but a matter of the heart.

Here are my husband's thoughts and word of advice when it comes to this topic.

"Facebook is a fire waiting to consume marriages...especially if you have a past history with many members of the opposite sex. Your brothers and sisters in Christ are the most dangerous if they do not understand their roles as a brother or sister. Things like pet names, facebook hearts, overstepping that persons marital boundaries, and such wreak havoc daily on the security of couples intimacy. It takes much wisdom to not usurp someone's husband or wife in something like a comment on a status. Like the Rock used to say. Know your role...and I would add, be wise in how you speak to someone else's husband or wife. You have NO rights or authority on them aside from that which is outlined in scripture. Perhaps you had some type of unlawful access to them when they were single, but that does not justify you trespassing into their marriage now. Many of my dearest sisters in the Lord have been my most consistent home wreckers not only to I, but to other brothers. I have no legalistic laws to place here, just be wise, and respect the sanctity of people's marriage. If you truly understand what I'm saying, then you will see that this process starts in respecting single people whom you are not intentionally pursuing for marriage. Why have access to someone that will have to be cut when you or the other marry? All of this I have learned the hard way. God Bless!-Ty"

This Momentary Marriage By John Piper

This Momentary Marriage

CLICK HERE TO GET THIS BOOK FOR FREE!

 

 I just had to share their testimony with you guys. Our God is so amazing. I am so excited to read through this book with my husband and Lord willing a couple of friends.

 

 

Learning To View Him As Lord

Marriage, such a beautiful blessing. I've always dreamed of being married and spent much of my time in my singleness preparing to be a godly wife and mother with the hope that my request would be granted by the Lord. I read books, watched videos, prayed and now that I am married, I'm having to unlearn almost everything I have learned.

I've only been married for a short period of time but in these 4 little months, the Lord has taught me a lot about His Character, my depravity and my need for Him. I've failed my wonderful husband in so many ways and have fallen on my face time and time again. During the last few months of my courtship, knowing that marriage was around the corner, I spent much time meditating on my future role and the idea presented in Genesis 2:8 which states "The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." I imagined what it meant to be a suitable helper for my husband and sought to do just that. I told myself  "I'm going to be a helper! With God's help, I will go above and beyond what is required of me and blow Tyrell away and He will praise the Lord on our wedding day for blessing him with such a mate," So NOT a good idea. In seeking to be his helpmeet, I've accidentally frustrated his plans and got in the way. Our conversations went something like this:
Tyrell: "Marie, why did you do that? What happened?"
Me: "Well you looked like you needed help so I tried to help"
Tyrell: "I understand... but why didn't you wait for me to lead by asking you or..."
Me: "I'm sorry... I just wanted to be a good helper, I just wanted to fill in the gaps and help out"

Praise the Lord that my now husband was gracious to me and stuck by my side. He later on taught me that I am a helper by simply carrying out his will.

From that point on into our marriage, I developed a new plan. I decided that I was going to focus on pleasing my husband by not getting in the way since I kept ending up in that position in my attempt to "help". I wanted to be a blessing not a burden to him.

Can you guest the result of that idea??? Yep, you guessed it, a total disaster! I got to a place where I didn't want to inconvenience my husband. I tried to do everything on my own and stay out of the way. This new habit really hurt my husband and made him feel insulted because being my protector, lord and husband he desires nothing more. He wants to help, that is his role! and in my attempt to bless him with a woman who isn't needy/helpless, I've only hurt him and made the situation worse. He would say things like " Honey, it is an honor to serve you." Over time, after a study of Psalm 50 together, the Lord began to reveal to me why my husband was hurt. The Lord reminded me that I am but dust and the importance of giving Him thanks and trusting Him in times of trouble. The Psalm was powerful and in seeing the relationship between Christ and His Bride, I was able to see where I had erred within my own marriage. What an insult it would be for us to say to God "Lord, this and that happened and I'm really hurt but you don't have to deal with the situation because I know how uncomfortable it is for me so I don't want to put such a burden on you?" Or "I don't know if you want to but I really need..." He is God! He is your Lord! Where else can you go if you need help? Who else can you ask and make aware of your need without dishonoring God?

Seeing who I am in light of who God is always helps me to reverence the Lord and honor Him. In the same way, I need to view my husband properly, not as a frail being who needs my super awesome help but as my lord, leader, protector and hero. I need to serve him, if he asks me to do something simply because that is good and it not only honors him my lord but the Lord of Lords who has placed him over me.

This new understanding turned everything I learned about "Biblical Womanhood" UPSIDE DOWN. I had to learn that I am the weaker vessel and that's ok. It is good for me to ask for help if I need it. It is totally fine for me to be hurt and admit it. It's extremely good for me to be a woman not a man. Then I wondered, how did we get to a place where Biblical womanhood equaled Feminism! How did we get to a place where we teach young women to be men rather than graceful, submissive, precious, beloved beings called to love and submit to their own husbands so that the word of the Lord may not be blasphemed? Being a homemaker/wife is a beautiful calling and a great honor! It is good and holy. Now to apply what I've learned. This has been an amazing journey thus far and I am so thankful that the Lord has chosen to humble me and show me these truths before my baby boy enters the world. To God be all the Glory and Praise!

3 1/2 months married ^_^

Almost 2 months married!

Most ask us this question : "How does it feel?" Well surprisingly I don't feel any different... I'm just thankful made our marriage possible and blessed us as much as he has. It's been awesome having Tyrell around but we haven't really had time to just sit and plan things. We have a strong desire to share the Gospel and make disciples but it's been hard to plan an event or time to go out together so we've been in the hands the Lord. we consider everyday as sacred and we pray to be used by the Lord for His glory. Our prayer for 2012 is that we would witness many coming to the saving faith of Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior of mankind. May the Lord have His way!

Thank You Everyone!!!